Dark Climbing

on October 31, 2011 in Misc

You know you’re desperate for any action hero silliness when a shoe on the roof of your condo building’s garage strikes you as an opportunity.

As you know, I live in a lovely old 1939 building with a long garage in the rear, and you know that I’ve climbed up onto the garage roof in the dark.

(Doing it in the day doesn’t work because 1) sensible people, such as the building manager, might ask what the hell you’re doing up there; 2) climbing up in the daylight is no challenge; and 3) Layla climbs trees and buildings in the dark so that’s what I have to do.)  Anyway, in the last week or two someone tossed an old shoe up there.  It’s on the east side of the garage roof and near the tree — my favorite means of ascent.  (At the other end are power lines way too close to the roof for my comfort.)

Yesterday I figured that old shoe would look better on the roof or an eave of the least popular neighbors in my neighborhood:  the ones who live in the party house.  In fact, super gluing that shoe to their house would be rather appropriate since on Saturday they had yet another party that woke me up at 3:00 a.m.

So last night near midnight I went out a couple times and climbed the tree beside the garage.  I had to do it a couple times because the first time I got up there I didn’t have a flashlight and couldn’t see the shoe.  So I got my tiny, very bright LED flashlight, went back out and again climbed up to the roof’s edge, only to realize that the shoe was farther out on the roof than I’d thought, and yes I could get to it but not without making a hell of a lot of noise.

You see, the leaves and vines and branches on that side of the garage are still so freaking CRUNCHY!

I thought the snow we’d had, which has already melted, would soften all the vegetation, but nope, it’s SUPER CRISPY and VERY NOISY yet again.  This is why climbing up there in other seasons is easier.  You may also recall that in my neighborhood PEOPLE NEVER SEEM TO SLEEP!  There’s always someone out walking a dog or jogging or whatever, and porch lights are burning brightly, hence practicing secret climbing can be a challenge.

And that’s when I remembered, as I stood straddle-legged on two branches of the tree, that Monday was Halloween.  People would be going up and down the sidewalk only a few yards away, and making noise, and crunching through the leaves, and if someone is climbing up a tree to a roof, they won’t pay much mind ’cause folks are out having weird fun.  I’ve never done a Layla stunt under such bustling social circumstances, have I?

So guess what I’ll be doing tonight for Halloween.  Then again, it should only take a few minutes, which will leave me plenty of time to go out and see all the decorations and pumpkins and trick or treaters.  And those little kids will be a great cover for me as I wander over to the partying neighbor’s house.

Have a spooky one.

2 Responses to “Dark Climbing”

  1. And I hope no one taped you on the roof and put it up on YouTube!

  2. Helena says:

    Alex – Nope, got away with it. No film of me yet!