Archive for February 18th, 2013


SPOILER ALERT!

If you haven’t yet seen Sunday’s Downton Abbey or Silver Linings Playbook but plan to, you may want to skip this blog today.

Now for my rant.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, JULIAN FELLOWES, MR. HOTSHOT WRITER OF DOWNTOWN ABBEY?

I mean, it’s not enough that you killed off Sybil. It’s not enough that you whacked off characters during the Great War and the Influenza.  Now you had to go and kill Matthew only hours after he became a father.  Mere minutes after he tells his wife how much he loves her and he’s practically dancing with joy and love and sheer bliss.  What?  A character is happy? That means you must KILL HIM OFF!

You are a sick bastard, Julian Fellowes. Please take your writing awards and put them in a dark unpleasant place in your body.

You should have seen Silver Linings Playbook before you wrote your downer script.  Go see it right now and pay close attention to the scene in which Bradley Cooper finishes reading Hemingway’s A Farewell to Arms, throws it through the window in anger and disgust, and storms into his parents’ bedroom to lecture them about how Catherine shouldn’t have died at the end of the novel and what is wrong about writing a happy ending?

I wish Bradley Cooper would break into your house and deliver that same lecture to you.  Okay, so I want Bradley to break into my home too but for other reasons I won’t go into here.

And guess what Silver Linings does so very well.  Guess why the movie is a huge hit and people are seeing it two and three times.  Because by the end of the movie, after all the heartbreak and yelling and crying the characters go through, there’s a HAPPY ENDING!  Is life perfect for them?  No.  Is Bradley’s mental illness cured?  No.  Will he have a career again, an income, an okay future?  Maybe.  We’re not sure.

All we know is that his in-your-face noisy family and mentally whacko friends are gathered for a cheerful Sunday TV football game, and Bradley is in the kitchen corner with his lady love Jennifer Lawrence in his lap, and they’re smooching while his mother, who’s a freaking SAINT and been through hell for her loved ones, smiles in approval.

That’s all we needed.  The movie’s ending wasn’t forced or unexpected.  There was no deus ex machina twist or fancy literary showmanship, and no soap opera obsession with drama and death.  Just a closing scene that gives us some warm fuzzies after putting us through the emotional ringer.

But the ending to your show tonight?  Hated it.  I really, really hated it.

Yours truly,

A pissed off writer